“…and I need you to just be quiet please” these were the words that came through to my ears as I stood at the register at Walmart while my cart items were being processed. I looked to my right and saw a tall man in probably his mid-forties standing about a foot away from an elderly woman who was leaning onto the Walmart cart with items in it. She looked expressionless. I turned back to the cashier who at that time looked at me and smiled…she continued processing my items. Then it came, these words “mom please, I don’t need you to keep talking about it, and put that phone away and ZIP IT…SHUT UP” I raised my head from looking at my wallet and looked at the cashier who looked at me, this time not smiling but just a tad bit horrified to hear these words from a grown son to his mother.
Let me back up a bit as to how I’m having to write about moms today. My daughter’s school is having a book exchange for Christmas. I walked into Walmart besides regular purchases, to find and purchase a kid appropriate book for her to wrap for a classmate. After surveying all the books, I landed on this one titled “I Want My Mommy” by Tracey
Corderoy. If you haven’t guessed, yes I read the book cover to cover before deciding to buy it (side note – do read your kids’ books before they do) This book is fun, appropriate for a five year old and most importantly, has very good lessons to reassure any kid worried about being apart from his or her parent. Arthur loves his mother so much and knows he’ll miss her when he goes to grandmas. Despite having a lot of fun at grandma, he always looked to see mommy walk through the front door. Finally when the doorbell rang, and it was mommy standing at the door, Arthur run so fast into her arms. So to be standing in line, paying for this book and hearing the exchange between a mother and son broke my heart.
Being a parent isn’t easy. There is no manual that comes with it. Mothers in particular…from the minute we find out there is a ‘bun in the oven’ to when we meet our bundle of joy for the first time…the feeling while very different from mother to mother, there is one constant – this is MY child. I believe that first time moms, second, third, fourth time moms would agree that with each child- naturally born, adopted, inherited, borrowed, whichever way you became a mother – you would agree that with each child you learned something new! You either corrected mistakes made with the first born or you invented new ways to make life a joy to live in…usually for the child…ha. No matter what the parenting journey has been, I also believe that irrespective of how your parents raised you, mom especially (as they did their best given what they knew and lacked) as kids – young or old, there are many reasons why mom should have more of your loving heart this holiday season and…always.
She was your incubator
She was/is your nurse
She was/is your personal assistant
She was/is your chauffeur
She was/is your personal chef and waitress
She was/is your alarm clock and time-keeper
She was/is your bank
She was/is your shelter
She was/is your safety and security
She was/is your counselor
She was/is your housekeeper
She was/is your laundromat
She was/is your Santa
She was/is your photographer
She was/is your disciplinarian
She was/is your teacher
She was/is your voice of reason
She was/is your cheerleader and devoted spectator
She was/is your comedian
She was/is your storyteller
She was/is your fixer-it-all
She was/is your know-it-all
She was/is your shopping buddy
She was/is your encourager
She was/is your best friend
She was/is your built-in nanny/babysitter
She is your MOTHER/MOMMY/MOM/MAMA/MA
I know that as adults, sometimes we may find some of the things they say, do, ask, tell…annoying, heck irritating BUT in no way should these words as spoken by the young man come out of your mouth to your mother. As I walked away from Walmart, my heart heavy with thoughts of my mothers (blessed to have two and alive); I also thought of those who have and don’t appreciate; and those who don’t have and wish they had; and those who had, appreciated but lost; and those who had, didn’t appreciate and lost.
Life is so fickle, love your mom while she’s still here…and like Arthur in the book, always run fast into her open arms anytime you see her. And unlike the man at Walmart, if your mommy is an angel now, hold on to the precious memories you have of her.
Stay Blessed, Stay FREE
Kate